and trust me i need no booty pop lessons
I thought she was going to get passionate and throw her on the bed and fuck her, but she just started breaking stuff.
That's the thing about women.
nothing can go wrong this weekend. $1500 to spend. i have options for hookups every night. my backup plans have backup plans
His was the first dick to ever be in my mouth... Of course I'm going to the wedding.
After he came inside me, he made us hold hands and pray that I wasn't pregnant.
The fact that he just came out makes his Lent commitment to give up gay sex so much more meaningful now.
This storm betta not fuck with taco tuesday
Hope you don't mind if I never tell my family about you.
Please don't place wagers on my sex life unless you are giving me a cut. With my current sluttiness I feel like I deserve 40% for how much money you'll make
he has to serve us drink and appetizers in his french maid costume for the Pirates game tonight. Bring everyone.
I literally stopped banging her when my ESPN app alerted me that the Spurs had won. That's how much I hate Lebron. I would rather watch him cry in the post game interviews than get it in
i gotta stop hooking up with people just to get to their dogs
That was right around the time that the drunken mess pulled out his dick in front of myself and like 10 other people and started peeing all over the train platform while saying, "Sometimes a bear gets you brother. Sometimes a bear gets you."
Pretty standard Thursday night commute for you, no?
How'd your date go last night?
Well I blacked out at 1:30 and woke up naked in not-my-date's bed with an uneaten Jimmy John's sandwich.
Vegas never ceases to amaze me. Hung out with a stripper from ATL all night and got nuthin, but the next night meet a bride-to-be who gives me a bj in the elevator.
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