Hey I don't know if you will get this but all I know is you are so beautiful to .ee and? I dare anyone to stop me me from caring for you ante so beautiful so I kid you not gorgeous iyoiu are so beautiful to me i dare som.eone too stioo you
On a scale of one to trashy, how is this: Got drunk, gave a guy a hand job. In the middle of the bar
I think you broke the trashy scale
I love my penis, it thinks for me sometimes
vagina is talking i cant
im afraid if i stop breathing i will turn into a porcupine
That's what you get for drunk dialing me to ask what kind of flowers I like while outside of a strip club, after telling me you "made it rain"
The chick working the drive through at BK on New Years stuck her head out the window and told me there were no line ups for the bathrooms inside so i should go in there. I just kept squatting and peeing and told her it would prob help business.
But apparently I got kicked in the head by a stripper at some point
Got a handy at the foam party. Took girl home. Banged her. Thanked her for foam handy. "what handy?"
Nothing shouts "I'm single" like a thousand needlepoint pillows.
Would jacking off with Benadryl cream be good or bad for the poison oak on my dick?
Shoot me. Oh my god shoot me. My moms ex "likes assholes"
He just kept mumbling that he was too drunk for society and then he peed in a bush
Waffles and pussy, what else is there?
I told him to not try to hang out with me ever again and now I regret it Bc im bleeding through my uterus and just want him to suck on my aching nipples
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