your thong is hanging out like whoa
I just had my first uncircumcised penis. I kept staring at it like the foreskin was going to fall off on its own.
The glockenspiel player has some booze though so hopefully the ride won't be that bad
We agreed to not shave eyebrows when someone is passed out. douchebag.
Puked in my laptop case in the middle of my nutrition class.
Found out why they call her Halfpipe Jenny-NOT the cool reason we thought
I was to drunk to walk in jimmy john's so I called and got a pickle delivered to me outside the bar , too much?
yea i really dont care about the sex, i just want him to eat my vag. He has to be good at because of his tremors.
We had car sex in the parking lot of the dispensery while he blasted Tony Bennett. It was so fucking romantic.
I just dropped $300 on lingerie. He better rip this off with his teeth.
I should be done at 8 and I've also done a great Job of convincing my self that I should get really drunk tonight
Hypothetically speaking, when I get a sugar glider would it be frowned upon to bring it Ito classes with me in m pocket?
Omg i got really stoned and used a makeup app on my grandma...well, I’m definitely not adopted
she referred to her cum as “pussy butter” so needless to say we had a good night
I knew she was the one when we had sex to the halo soundtrack.
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