Hahaha, sighhhh...I texted him to no response. It's a shame, really...I would gladly exchange my body for pizza rills.
Btw, I'm really high so I apologize if anything I say gets translated into arabic.
I wonder if all of the nights I blacked out will be revealed to me when I die. Have you ever thought about that?
Drinking mikes hard & watching the swan princess. i fucking LOVE college
My favorite part was when he stopped, looked up in the middle of performing oral sex and asked, "you did know it was Arbor Day, right?"
then again I'm sitting on a tree stump completely naked in the dark listening to some type of glee soundtrack.
She told me she wanted to wax my ass. I'm terrified and oddly aroused.
Looks like a significant portion of my drinking money just became legal fees.
Weve literally been going out drinking five days a week. That counts as a full time job right?
He just said his penis sings like Mariah Carey...Im going with drunken.
When do you want to get tanked and forget our entire college education?
He won't have sex to beyonce. I hate him.
So I have to masturbate in a hospital. I wonder what kind of porn they have.
i found waldo and immediately set him to work eating me out. please have more out of season costume parties.
He tried to buy me a drink at dollar beer night. All 3 of his credit cards were declined, so he asked me if I could cover it. Needless to say, I'm not calling him back.
Randomize