I just convinced a girl to drink my spit cup cuz I said it was dark beer and would get her drunk faster. I dare you to try something better.
he wanted to have me eat skittles off of his body. he mad gay sex even gayer.
she just asked me to help her create a twitter page for edward cullen's hair.... seriously.
How can people commit suicide when things like bagels exist
Found out why they call her Halfpipe Jenny-NOT the cool reason we thought
Meanwhile I'm working a fucking flute workshop and I'm one high c away from shoving a flute up the asshole of the next passerby
Just gave candy to a strange child. Not my best move.
That's not a current picture, because if you look deep enough into my eyes you can still see morals. Not these days.
There's nothing quite like having a little 8 year old boy hand me a Bible on campus while I'm on my way to the health center because of my recent slutty tendencies.
he brings me coffee and gets a blow job. not sure if I trained him or he trained me or it's simply mutually beneficial beautiful.
I won the 'drunkest person at a family event' award tonight.
The highlight of the trip was definitely my dad telling me that I "used to be his prettiest daughter."
I will consider it. I need to determine if ogling him is worth almost certain death via zipline.
My neighbors are white girl rapping to Hamilton again...
Just had someone from Hells Angels snort coke off my tits...so I'm pretty much done with life now. 💀
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