I think she gave up trying 2 land a bf and let herself go
You misogynist thinking that every girl wants a bf
They do. I don't appreciate u using big words idk and im gonna take offense
he called me a worthless slut and then went 2 the bathroom 2 pee on the floor before leavin. but he was really hot and he left his jacket, should i call him?
theyre doing shots to celebrate her boob jobs anniversary.
yea and when she crawled to her room she yelled at a bookbag to "get the fuck out my way"
I am unfriending an ex-one night stand because his profile picture is of his wife's ultrasound.
I was high enough to think that mac-n-cheese w/ ketchup, tortilla chips w/ ketchup, and milk was a fancy dinner
As hard as i've been partying lately their gonna have to revoke my organ donor status
he didn't stitch me up last time. in fact, he yelled at me for bleeding.
I have a tab of a google image search of onion rings open and it is making me so happy.
Take off your clothes and see if he wants to have sex, that's a good way to find out
I repeat do not go to a jail visit drunk, those stools are easy to fall off.
I just puke and rallied at my anniversary dinner #winning
Wait what do you mean I BOUGHT A FUCKING HORSE LAST NIGHT?!?!
My father has a definite type: blonde, busty, 18-22. It was awkward when I was in college, but now I'm over it. I play wingman for him and he buys me expensive purses for the assistance in getting him hooked up with girls younger than me. Win-win.
3 weeks in a row I've pulled '69' at the deli counter...God is giving me shit for not getting laid in a year....
Randomize
