i just google imaged poop.
i threw up on the blunt... he was pissed.
It was so delicious I was introducing it to people. Guy from my psych class was like "This is my girlfriend, Erica," and I was like, "This is my milkshake, Oreo."
Robbie told me you spent 10 mins discussing the curl in his hair and that you said "with that curl in your hair, you'll go far"
When you gave the girl your number the fat girl was like "take mine....here please take mine"
ttyl tear gas
There is a visibable outline from you in the grass. its you in the fetal position...
New level of stoned. My Terry's Chocolate Orange didn't 'whack-and-unwrap' so I ate it like an apple.
Idk tell her to wear something sluttty. I have that one skirt I got arrested in if she wants to borrow?
Dude when we asked him where he lived all he could tell us was "by the slurpees." That fucked up.
I've friend zoned this boy hard. I made him change my nipple rings before he went home.
Apparently I blacked out and started wrestling with some dude last night. Just found out I might have dislocated his shoulder. Best part: he still wants to bone me
The hospital waiting room is starting to become a very familiar place to me.
I jerked off 12 hours ago exactly. I owe it to my penis to get laid.
I just folded my laundry and I washed 3 pairs of underwear and 6 jizz towels. Clearly I'm quarantining right.
Randomize
