I seriously wish I was FB friends with her
I'm calling you out on twitter if you don't come over right now.
She tried to have sex with him but he quote unquote respected her
I'm at the point in my career when i know a sites a trap and isn't real porn
How has he not realized you're pregnant?
Spanx.
Woke up un the hot tuv. Climbed out fo the hot tub and fell asleeo. Woke ip again in the hot tub.
I was desperate so I downed my birth control with balsamic vinaigrette...
At least our walk of shames never included a bag of chips and a jar of queso..
Just had a guy dressed only in a towel ask me for a cig, hug me and kiss me then proceeded to pee of the balcony while still talking to me and callin me baby
its like what part of i just threw up mcdonalds breakfast means i want to make out with you?
Also, I found out that my dad has the name of every boy that I've ever dated and their physical description, car type and tag number stored in his computer.
Apparently Angela went missing once and he says he learned were to look first and that it's best to have information on hand.
I have already been up, showered, had a cup of coffee brought to me, added a little rum to cure the hangover, had sex and kicked him out and it's only 1pm. Successful day so far.
Is there a tactful way to ask "how are your balls?" Or do I just ask point blank
tell me about the fingering
I swear to god, if you ever yell my name during sex with my sister again..your balls will be stapled to your nipples.
Randomize
