the best part about tonight...knowing when i wake up in the morning his car will still be full of packing peanuts..and mine wont
Currently in a meeting. i am playing the not throw up game. god i hope i dont lose.
This is one of those situations that make me think to myself "what life decision did I make to get here"
Literally just spent 45 minutes converting my paintball gun to shoot condoms....
it's great music for shaving your balls
just got the results back. i love his dick even more now i know its clean
Whatever you gave me is making me lactate
Please make the clown in the corner stop judging me. I mean he's the one with paint on his face. I don't need him judge judying me.
Just so you know swallowing does not help chest colds. Your Phd can suck my dick
I'd rather make snow angels in a pool of elephant shit.than sleep with him.
I may be bringing home two guys tonight. I'f they won't go for a double-team you can have the lanky one.
Do they mail horrible human being awards or do I have to pick it up or what's the protocol on that shit
They just made me take another shot and I found out the liquor store next to my brothers house has a petting zoo
Mind. Blown.
I’ve got a lot of questions but the first one has to be where you got the flame thrower.
Vocabulary what?!? Shakespeare is my bitch.
Randomize
