you dont remember trying to break dance in the middle of the casino floor on ur own throw up?
oh that explains alot.
sunday morning discovery: something purple, smelly, and sticky my hair. any suggestions?
I may or may not have just visibly given him head in front of three young children and their mom. They all looked mortified.
I think we should make a list of challenges so that when stuff like that happens, we can check it off. Like a scavenger hunt for hoes.
Also, I just saw a woman change into her stripper outfit in the bathroom at Target.
I AM OVULATING LIKE A STEAM ENGINE.
Getting wasted on top of a casino. My penis is so much higher than everyone else's right now.
All I remember is mattress sliding down the stairs while giving him a blow-job. Sorry you had to witness the incident.
I will pee on everything he values.
Can't a white girl just get drunk on a Sunday night and eat rice crispy treats. SHIT
Remember Christopher who always sends me pictures of his penis? Look to your right, boy in the blue.
She said I'm like warm bathroom-sink water. There's nothing necessarily wrong with me, but she doesn't exactly want to "drink me in"
Remember how I have such good luck that it's almost bullshit?
I'm afraid to ask, but go on.
I'm pretty sure I have PMS because I almost just cried about not being able to find a place that gives acrobat classes here.
In other news I was masturbating last night and came really fucking hard to the thought of yelling at a customer....
He woke up and decided to go for a swim in the lake... At about 3am... With his dogs
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