forget your mom, you can see her anytime. A one night stand only happens ONE night.
I drank too much. My snot smells like vodka when I blow my nose.
Thanksgiving. A stoners favorite holiday
I farted on Jack's balls last night. He got pissed and walked away cause he knew it was on purpose. I couldn't hold it in anymore.
I didn't sleep with her. I'm boycotting arizona and she's from phoenix.
is this the sara with the beer cane?
Its like "fucckkkkk yooouuuuuu" is echoing up my esophagus
tequila?
yep
Your message cut off at "shit on the floor". Your life is incredible.
The liquor stores are closed! NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO! CURSE YOU SANDY!!!!
sex on the stairs. not our finest idea.
THEY AREN'T MARRIED. PUT ON YOUR HOMEWRECKING PANTIES AND GET TO WORK. NO EXCUSES.
According to timehop today marks the 3rd anniversary of my 1st blackout
i was making a gravity bong in my room and my dad walked in. he helped me finish. i love being home for the holidays.
If a guy makes a dick joke within 24 hrs of matching am I just setting myself up for disaster if I say yes to a date lol
Who brings a stripper to breakfast at the dining hall? What was the plan? Impress her with his meal plan?
Randomize
