yeah...it smells like an asshole would smell if someone ate sewage.
you are the sluttiest virgin ive ever met
thanks it was an honor just to be nominated
You know you're a nerd when you lose track of how many times you've gotten turned on watching Glee.
How can it be called memorial day weekend....I don't even remember this weekend
the $20 limit for secret santa doesn't apply to me cause you know a half gram of coke is more than $20
She tried to escape and she fell and hit the door. She's gunna freak when she wakes up with only half a tooth.
The guy I wanted to make out with just got beat up, let's roll.
I always figured rock bottom would've involved more hookers
She said to bring taco sauce. Hoping that's a euphemism.
I saved him as teletubby in my phone....that can't be a good sign. I'm not answering.
This theraflu would make for a great margarita.
I can make a sudafedarita
They wear helmets and mouth pieces when they drink...u down?
It was just like old times except for going to hangover throw up before waking my parents up to open presents. Merry Christmas!
If you end up at a gay bar on a tuesday night in steelers pjs, does that mean youve hit rock bottom?
STOP GETTING GIRLS PREGNANT IN MY BED.
Randomize