K, im just throwing this out there, i am not making out with any of his friends... Especially the cross eyed one.
I want a vodka facial right about now. I'm talking about straight vodka bukkake
he had his head down and said he was listening for the buffalo, he had to still be drunk.
you have no chance. her best friend is a human abstinence poster.
We could make it a date. Dinner and a show. The show being my nipples getting pierced.
can you come back were all locked out and alyssia's still inside passed out on the floor but more importantly i left a beer in there that's not finished
We thought we were getting kicked out but then he started tickling the bouncer. Next thing you know the bouncers giving him a piggy back ride to the bar.
We legit stopped the the game so that Jamie and I could throw up in the bushes, and then continue to play intramurals... this is what my life is coming to1
IT'S LINGERIE PURCHASED FROM A FLEA MARKET, THE ONLY THING IT'S GOING TO BE POSITIVE FOR IS A TEST FOR HIV
My chest hair is, as we speak, arching upward to embrace my neck beard. The union will be a storied one.
You got called a pussy at a party with a slow cooker, you can't let that shit slide
I found his belly button lint in my hair. Can't say it was worth it.
The extent of "getting it in" was this creepy guy sticking his finger in my bellybutton
yyyea i think im gonna go get a bowl and play skyrim. And by bowl i mean something i can throw up in, not weed
please tell dad to clear the porn off his tablet before he lends it to anyone from now on
Randomize
