Letd wlk him
Lrtd walek hime
Lets wlk home,,,ther we go
made out with the bouncer to distract him from how illegitimate my fake id is.
Then we started crawling around on the floor because we couldn't get up so decided to be tigers instead. Gotta love power hour.
you made cement angels. it was a great sight.
we got so high we spray painted his girlfriend's UGG boots. she's CRYING. it's hysterical.
I feel like every car around me knows I'm driving in my snuggie
Now there's vomit covered trash all over the front lawn. I feel accomplished
Sometimes you gotta take the crosseyed stripper. fuck it
My dad just bought me a 40. I consider this our peace treaty.
my roommates tied me up with rope and duct tape then left me outside the door to the hot girls' suite on my floor, knocked on the door and ran away leaving me there with a sign that says free
I just Miyagied my roommate through her first set of tit pics. Her fuck buddy owes me.
I have to hand it to her. In my heyday I took home the 'biggest shitshow of the night' award 9 times out of 10. But I passed the torch on to her last night, and she went skipping merrily far and away with it into the enchanted world of aggressive alcoholism. Is this 30?
So how do I tell him I've been sleeping with his wife too?
I just volunteered myself to get tazed this should get interesting
i just used your hair clip to unclog my bong. i miss you so much!
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