I'd fuck her but she fucked Dusty. And I'm pretty sure he's humped livestock
I just criticized a porno's use of editing. Film school is ruining me.
I'm not sure, but I think she had a tampon in when we fucked
and his room smelled like strippers, childrens tears, and fear
We just made a drinking game out of our chemistry review. This might explain my chemistry grade.
You Were screaming "Im trying to get it in" and "stop cock blocking" while i threw you in the car
but i'm paying and its not a date cause he's got a gf and i'm hooking up with his roommate tomorrow night
thanks for at least making it out of the pool before you threw up
i have learned 4:30 is too early to start pregamming for the midnight harry potter
I think I should advise against you hooking up with a guy that throws "the shocker" up in all of his pictures on facebook. Just sayin.
Come to the roof. We are drinking breakfast.
Can't be like "hey can you elaborate on this three year old tweet" can I?
Just for the record, I did not have sex in your bed. Happy 4th of July.
My vagina measures dicks. It's accurate to the half inch.
Congratulations! We have a period
Randomize
