she calls it her "sourpuss" because everyone makes that face when they see it.
she was hot for a redneck and i dont look at teeth
I love how all these freshman girls think that they can wear what they wore last summer... freshman 15 at its skankiest
Haha so I huess that means he's a little over 7. I can use my throat as a ruler!!
One less school supply you need to buy!!
I'm concerned you might be passed out on a random rooftop right now. Not concerned enough to do anything about it. Hope you're alive. Goodnight.
you better not pull some "waking up at 2 in the afternoon" shit, we have weed to smoke.
I just puked behind a tree outside work, then walked past my manager with puke in my hair. Man, I'm gonna miss this when I get a real job.
As i was laying there shouting that he dislocated my hip he actually reached his armed around and patted himself on the back
He puked over my shoulder into the toilet. The guy in the next stall sounded totally appalled.
I didn't know where we were going to start fucking, so I just strategically hid condoms all over the house before he came over.
Before he comes over remember the house standards. Ask yourself "will he stalk my sister or myself in the future?". If the answer is yes, then no, he isn't allowed.
I pulled up iMessage on my computer and I'm pretty sure two people in my class saw that dick pic you sent. Sorry!
I also slapped not one but two bananas on the ass, twerked in public, and I think I made out with someone
I just drunk texted the Italian guy and now I’m flooded with Shane. Uh, shame, not Shane. He sounds nice, though.
If you think I'm going to drive 5.5 hours just to bang a guy, you'd be absolutely right.
Randomize
