I am really glad that on the inside of a card from your grandparents you have transcribed the rules for circle of death
if my college career had corporate sponsors, they would be natty light and aim toothpaste.
still drunk. talking shit to the doc drawing my blood. this has no upside
Yeah, but there's no serving sizes for dick.
Just found my shirt from Saturday, got an automatic contact buzz.
I was just about to send a concerned text until I opened my door and saw a shopping cart. I'm glad you made it home in one piece and with toys.
On a lighter note, the guy I gave a lap dance to then fell asleep on his crotch just facebook friend requested me..
Aside from the slim chance of pregnancy, I'm gonna call last night a raging success.
Totally sleeping on a bloodstained mattress tonight. I love life's little adventures.
Get your ass over here, we're drinking Patron and watching My Little Pony. Patron and Ponies, do you copy?!
Drinking vodka and pirating music in the library. Welcome to finals week.
Remind me in the morning that I've now seen a guy do crack. That actually happened. I'm at the wrong party.
I should have bailed a long time ago. I mean, he has a bible verse-a-day app next to his dick pics in his phone.
His truck was very sexy. Unfortunately, shortly thereafter, I discovered that the whole overcompensating thing is very true...
Is it just me or is it like a girl gets married and all of a sudden she’s a “blogger”?
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