I wish i knew how bad drinking and hieghts were before i got up here
shes the kind of girl i dont like to talk to unless my penis is in her mouth.
went out last night and woke up on the bathroom floor again, thinking about just moving my bed in there.
somehow writing 'not a skank' on yur boobs doesn't really make you look less skanky...
I wasted my skinny years on you. The least you can do is high five me at the bar
The pride tent is doing free lube tastings. There is also a mechanical bull.
well I think it'll pretty much be gone by Saturday. On a scale of 1- Snooki's unborn child how much do periods freak you out?
Drunbk and roasting marshmallows on my stove. Accidentally singed the catr's fur but she'sd alright.
I haven't been sober in 4 days.
Then be sober
No.
That awkward moment when your boyfriend tries to have sex with his go pro on #hdporn
You need to stop telling people you gained weight over the holidays. You've been fat since July.
Like I don't care that he's a drug dealer, but I have a problem with his inefficient and ineffective business model.
At first I was nervous, then drunk me thought: What other chance will you realistically have to fuck a British guy?
its like probably shouldnt be sending pics of your asshole to strangers who work in the same building as you
Cancel your plans for the fourth someone is streaming iron chef on twitch
Randomize
