Well, I fucked her. But the sex wasn't all that great. Morning sex never is
Ok so the guy below me is either having sex very loudly or is very lonely
NExt question... Do i wanna sleep under my palm tree
YES.
she got to the point every few minutes she checked to see if her boobs were still there.
my goal is to not remember how i make a living by 9pm saturday night
Once he past out I measured his penis with my remote.
If I ever die and svu has to come to my murder scene make sure they know I don't wear underwear always so it might not be as bad as they think
She just kept saying "bless your heart" to him while he cried because he came so fast. I think a Texas woman was just what he needed
Hey hey, in my defense we were just suppose to watch Disney movies from a blanket fort with beer and nachos. I was I suppose to know it would end in tears?
She was pouring Goldschlager in my mouth during the shower sex. How can you NOT like her?
can we for just one second remember that I played with a homeless man's rat at st marks?
Dude. You dropped to your knees and face planted into the rocks. And continued to talk on the phone and laugh. That's where those cuts came from.
I mean. I just want to sit in my bed and eat bagels. What's wrong with that?
Have you ever wondered if we are just made up characters in someone's head? You'll have to forgive me right now I think I have 7 thumbs
I got kicked out of the E.R. for saying "balls".
Randomize
