Just found my shirt from Saturday, got an automatic contact buzz.
If I weren't her cousin I'd take advantage of her and this low point in her life.
You crawled everywhere and rolled in ice cream. No more vodka for a month.
Bring your friend that fell asleep in the bathroom for my friend.
Half of my brain feels like I donated it to science and they basically just poured jack Daniels on it and put out cigarettes into it before returning it to my skull
We can Fuck in the shower to save time
And this is why I like you. You're so damn innovative.
I'm shoveling snow with a camel-pack full of beer in a blizzard. I love snow days as an adult!!!
Well we were going to compare notes, but all I could remember was throwing up, and all she could remember was kissing, so then we decided to not compare anything.
We could have a classy candlelight sonic dinner with fireball cocktails if you leave now. Twat tickler centerpieces.
Like I respect him so much I would suck his dick
In a very non respectful way
He must've been a bear in a previous life. My nipple is bleeding. Shit's sensitive.
His dick is magical but I don't want to die in this blizzard do you see my dilemma
all I got out of honors convocation is I've hooked up with a lot of smart guys
He says the sweetest things but also that he wants to choke me when we fuck so it's kinda perfect.
Already doing pt exercises by picking my margarita up off the night stand. Fuck yeah.
Randomize