Hahahhahaha! Oooh get it! Ugh I am so dead but if I go to the lib whuich I will hopefully b havung sex instead, ill hit u up
I was just curling my hair topless and I just burned my nipple. Ouch.
when did we get to this "texting at random" level on friendship?
We had like 4 guys come over and buy us all drinks as an excuse to hit on Kendra. Hanging out with her is now officially fiscally responsible.
I just heard these 2 kids from flint and Detroit arguing over whose economy is worse... It's really sad what passes for competition in Michigan these days
This just in: I met a girl who does the phone sex phone lines, and shes' 5'4" 320. I'll never get a hardon again through a phone.
Oh and I guess I added our cab driver on Facebook. He has "liked" every single one of my beach pictures. Kill me now.
Just proved I could salsa dance in a bar where no one was dancing
Sidenote...no idea how to salsa
Making cookies for neighbors. Spill beer all over dough. Bake anyways. From good neighbors back to the shitty college kids next door in under 3 seconds.
Just jerked off with bubble wrap. Not as awesome as it sounds.
Maybe if he'd step up his game and get a real job instead of donating plasma and trying to grow pot then you wouldn't feel compelled to write prisoners in Oregon.
Last night was good. Things got bad when I found a sledge hammer.
You got stoned and bought $300 worth of pudding. Again! Why do YOU think she left you?
you know its getting late when the "nevers" are turning into "maybe"
He ate me out on the front lawn of the post office. The people in the office across the road definitely got a show!
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