Please dont use Danity Kane lyrics to describe your emotions.
Packing for the trip... do they take Visa in South Dakota?
Just saw a british exchange student take a flyer for free dental care. Yes.
everyone has their kryptonite. mine just happens to be 18 year old blonde girls.
I walked outside out to find her peeing in her toga with a cigar in one hand and her thong in the other
Look at the bright side...I have an 11 inch penis
He told me I had nice tits + they have a great shape. + then proceeded to flatten my boob + show me what the gross tits he's seen look like.
I think you would be disgusted with me if you knew how many times I had imaginary sex with you today
I consented to having my finger branded. How was your night?
We invited our waitress tonight to come too.... we told her she had lightning in her veins and in return she taught us a Texas Roadhouse dance so the logical next step was invite her to a kegger.
Sorry if this is weird, but please don't have sex in my truck. I get to be the first...
By the end of the first quarter he was so hammered he was pouring beer into the crockpot with the miniature hot dogs and BBQ sauce saying he loved the supper bowl and he loves taking mini weinies to the face
anyways, do you want to make more embarrassing memories that im bound to remind you about later and laugh about?
Right in the middle of our simultaneous orgasms, he shouted "HAPPY NEW YEAR" ruining the intimacy
let me just take this time to thank you again for buying pudding.
Randomize
