I have a pretty basic diameter of my vaginal abyss. I'm sure it won't hurt.
I have a client coming in and there's a note that says she wants her hair to like Elisabeth Hasselback's from the view
that's Oklahoma for you
my mom just informed me that i masturbate loudly
The nurse told me they're using the same medicine that killed michael jackson.
i threw up on the table at the pizza place and peed in her room mates closet. i wouldnt invite me back either
How was me telling you it's my mom's birthday a go-ahead to bang my sister???
then she kicked a hole in her own door and the next thing you know, brian's walking up to her room with power tools. in no condition to use them
and I believe it was when I was running to class to take a test still drunk in my Halloween costume that I realized I have reached that point in the semester where I just don't give a flying fuck anymore.
I get off at the next exit which doesn't have a shoulder, a guy is riding my ass so I cant stop. I think I got as much puke on his car as on mine.
This is most sickening thing I've ever seen, and I threw up my body weight in jello shots on my birthday.
She had caution tape on her head and she blew me.
nothing like having plan b for breakfast in a cvs parking lot before ordering this semester's textbooks
Sorry about my sloppy drunk texts. I'm not sure talking about banging a near dead Jimmy Stewart was my finest moment
What a way to start the day. Staring at penis for 3 hours
It's pretty much my favorite thing ever
Your cat ate my taco.
. . . I don't have a cat?
It was laying in your bed. Now it's hunting for more tacos.
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