Fiestas. Its like a classier verson of mardi gras.
you're just mad because in the hogwarts world I'm Harry and you're Ron. get over it.
the guy next to me needed a pen, so I let him take one from my book bag. my panties are now being passed around the class...thank you for telling me you hid them in my bookbag.
Street performer on bourbon st just lifted a sewer top so I could puke down it. I love New Orleans.
Can I have my ID back now or are you using it to crossdress again?
I have a music final in an hour so I put all the classical songs we need to know in a shower power hour playlist, beer included.
I have glow sticks stuck to my boobs and a missed call from the 911. I'd say last night was a success.
I was going to make out with him...then he licked syrup off the kitchen floor.
After I finished inserting the catheter he said he thought my name was familiar. Didn't have the nerve to tell him he was my fifth grade teacher.
Pretty sure the nurse said at one point I was in full restraints because I tried surfing my stretcher
Yeah when we were together he never sent me dick pics like a normal boyfriend. It was always pizzas. That should've been my sign.
I can't tell if my bong is gender-neutral or not
I just want to have sex that doesn't end like a B-rated horror movie.
I'm over here trying to figure out how to get shake shack delivered to my bed and Jamie is having a child
I threw my shoes out of frustration and walked home barefoot... can you help me find my shoes in the morning
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