My pussy is not your playground.
He managed to completely creep out every girl I was with last night. It was almost inspiring how efficient it was.
he said i looked like a lion with slutty lingerie on .
We can just keep having sex until one of us finds someone we actually like
I may or may not go. send a pic of a nipple so I know how much fun you're having
He is currently pregaming mini golf. MINI GOLF.
Oh were you the stripper at that club last Sunday when i was trippin on acid wearing a giraffe outfit?
Just smoked a joint with the hottest patient. God I love night shifts.
It's like my uterus needs a hug... and anti depressants
I made a bong out of my deodorant today. Did you?
The contents of my fridge consist of alcohol, Nuva ring, and cheesecake. I'm that girl.
You have the most beautiful penis I've ever seen. I never thought penises were meant to be beautiful, but you proved me wrong
at that point, I wouldn't blame you because I'd be so ashamed I couldnt even have sex with myself.
I think I found my saving grace in the form of a beard at the bar.
My dad called me in the middle of the night, drunk on vodka, asking for references on the Irish alphabet.
Randomize
