Life Lesson Number 76: Masturbating into a sock is useless if there is a hole in it.
it was like the sexual equivalent of when Wilson fell off the raft and floated away
I just accidentally stumbled into an AA meeting...I think its a sign
Nothing quite says America like barbecue and beer at 9 in the morning.
once i realized i was actively trying to drink the beer i was sweating out of my body i knew it was time to go to bed
Sandwiches are there for you when porn isn't.
I thought we agreed, no more super glueing action figures to my dick
I don't know if I have the sustained energy level for partying hard
Not a choice. You are mistaking my comments as options. My statements are facts. This is what is happening.
If you hook up with a kid and the next day he breaks up with his girlfriend, those can be seen as two completely unrelated incidents right?!
I was at a bus stop, eating a load of bread. Fairly sure I'm the poster child for poor students.
I'm not even 100% sure what it is, but if it involves Thor and Doritos, I'm in
I'm basically the yoda of knowing when someone wants to sleep with you
enjoying your night?
do dogs like to salsa?
I dont know if that answers my question or not
I feel like I had a successful night. I flashed the guy at the liquor store last night for 2 free tshirts and a giant redbull.
EMERGENCY SUBJECT CHANGE. SHE DOESN'T KNOW.
Randomize
