I accidentally had sex with my boyfriend's twin last night...and he didn't stop me.
How was it?
Fantastic, but that's not the point.
i jus seen this fat chick walk buy look like she had don king coming out her arm pits..
I wonder how many times I can be hungover in one day
I am the drunkest girl in the tree.
This soccer player girl is eating this banana WAY to slow. Too early for penis shaped foods.
She devotes each year to either men or women. I waited all year for her to be straight, tonights the night.
I feel like I was just dunked in a tub of beer and then thrown in a giant dryer with rocks in it.
I can't even type what I drank. I'll throw up
His dick is longer than my foot and I'm a size 9. I'm literally kicking myself in the vagina
i'm in that phase where i'll swallow anything except food
Fun fact: drinking me now steals weaponry
You merely adopted the alcohol. I was born into it. Molded by it. I didn't see the hang over until I was a man and by then it was only blinding.
We had sex and then stood naked in his living room eating zucchini bread.
One minute I'm going home the next I'm getting railed on the back 9.
Somehow, you looked so classy chugging that bottle of wine last night.
Randomize
