she looked like the bat from fern gully.
When i walked in, you were in bed with a hot chick rolled up in a green blanket and said you were acting like a caterpillar..
omg. he's a virgin strip club employee who's going to college on a ping pong scholarship. this is unreal.
I'm full of awesome ideas
Yesss you are. Im full of confusion. I keep finding peanut butter on my legs...
It took me 6months to figure out that he only had one testicle.
i had them turn on teen mom at the bar so i wouldnt be tempted to go home and make babies with the guy next to me
Like, I just want to be naked rolling around in soft things.
She's trying to put on her dog muzzle on her self
He is into some weird shit i walked in his room last night he was waving his hard dick around hitting shit yellin cock fight
I know he is still a student. I am not asking if his being an underwear model makes it more ethical, just less prosocutable.
I paid your brother in tostitos to drive me home.
Also, I would just like to reiterate my apologies for tearing up in the grocery store.
STOP SENDING ME NAKED PICTURES WHEN I'M TRYING TO TEACH. MONDAY TUESDAY 1-3 IS A DICK AND ARSE FREE ZONE
Like I wasn't going to make out with the hot Australian sitting next to me at the Portland blazer game?
No, I barely made it home last nite. Kept telling cab driver I live across the street from Susan Sarandon?? Thank god her coop addy is posted online.
Randomize