He is such a gentleman, he paid for my plan b
I accidentally burped into my bong.
We're starting "No Hesitation Fridays." The probability of this going horribly are between 100 to 125 percent
I just told a dude I hooked up with last night he was the pick of the litter.
PS August 29 of last year was when you ran over my foot. Facebook just reminded me.
after that, he'll be sure to remember me. i'll probably forget him, but that's the way it should be.
Well, I want to see you regardless of whether or not you will lick whipped cream off my body.
There really needs to be a redbox for wine because I want some but too lazy to walk into a store
I'm not into beards but apparently my vagina is.
This is seriously fucking awkward. My favorite sex scene just started and my dad's still here. He offered me Cheetos.
Please can we have sex in this office for old times sake
No? The only contact I've had with him for months was when I drunk texted him from Costa Rica to say that all jazz sounds the same
and then you proceeded to throw soup at him for calling you a bitch...a CAN of soup...
Its like people have to train for months before they try and drink with us and survive...
I picked up a towel, and butt beads fell out of it.
Oh yeah... Surprise!
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