Is it normal to miss your booty call?
it sucked. he totally couldn't get it up. blamed it on never having cheated b4. Couldn't stop laughing. fuck.
how can i change my meal plan to a keystone plan?
Two kids are drinking pounders in class. I think I'm hanging out with the wrong group of friends.
you should give me head with plastic fangs in
Listen, this was just a tiny lapse of judgement.
I'm pretty sure that's not a synonym for pregnancy.
i'm using salt from the free peanuts to stop the bleeding.
Three things I need a picture of: your friend, your bong, and your dick.
Apparently you can coat check a keg.
Attention ladies coming to the party tonight! Tonight will be another chance to win the 5 bucks for getting my cousin hard. Bring your a-game, no one has been able to overcome the whiskey dick yet. Good luck.
yeah people on the adjacent balcony, Im naked drinking outside in 0 degree weather at 1pm. got a problem?
I asked if he wants to help me spring forward at 2am on Sunday. He seems down.
I'm about to sell my hamster for weed money I'll call you in a few
When he couldn't get it up, he handed me a beer, put his clothes back on, and said "try again tomorrow."
The fact that we all screamed by Felicia to a bitch actually named Felicia will be a highlight of my life
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