Im listening to a jazz version of dick in a box.
she definitely blew him on the riverbank, some lady floated past and said "have some pride honey", amazingly awkward
I don`t remember Saturday, actually
Its ok, i dont remember 2007
i just had to use the keg as a stool to reach the margarita maker. i'm such a problem solver.
Did I tell you I had a charge show up for $36 on a credit card I haven't used in 6 months from Wild Wings? It was that night we slept across the street from the bar.
I'll just dance on top of the ping pong table, and if it's stable enough for that, then it's stable enough for sex
By the way, i got bored and just started putting my balls on every object in your room. One at a time.
Dude she flew me 1000 miles down to see her, broke up with me 7 hrs after arrival, and kicked me out with a week left til I fly home. Thank god college taught me how to shack up
Someone just told me I have an ass that could kill small children .... Don't know how to take that one
'lets look at pictures of your friend's new baby' was probably the worst post-sex idea we've ever had
I'm trying to ve beat feiesnd sent.
In honor of Dennis Farina dying, I'm offering up free mustache rides...2 takers so far.
I tried to prevent a bar fight. By convincing a guy whacked out on Molly to slap the ass of everyone who was arguing and shout "WOO" each time. I'm proud, surprised, and intrigued that it calmed everyone down so quickly...
I just want you to know when I bang him in the back of my car later I'll have pony by ginuwine on repeat
WHY are you masturbating to hockey fights?
Randomize
