Today's life lesson: fat girls should not wear tight miniskirts and vinyl leggings. This Forever 21 salesgirl is a hot mess.
its easy. just sleep with a bunch of guys until one falls in love
You were asking people if they could pee on you while you shotgunned beers
So does your leg always twitch violently when someone plays with your clitoris? Or has my ten years of piano playing finally paid off?
Anywhere you can eat green eggs and ham, you can have sex.
Is it bad that when my prof gave examples of "stalking" behavior, I either have done or would do most of them?
Question: Would it be wrong to just fuck both of them and decide who to date one performance of their cocks?
someone needs to make a hangover cure that isn't cocaine.
I am as serious as getting herpes in Mexico...
What do herpes have to do with anything?
Scary truckers and hobos. These are the men I attract
She makes margaritas with lemon-lime 5 hour energy..thats brilliant
and you were wondering how she got into Harvard
When you're not at your house I assumed you're somewhere having sex
I don't trust a bar IN TENNESSEE that doesn't have Jack Daniels.
I just found one of your beard hairs in my oatmeal.
Your life is a soap opera of great sex, cats, and booze.
Randomize
