What is this red stuff in a water bottle in my fridge that's labeled "not for baby turtles"?
I wanna fuck padma even more now that she's preggers. Is that sick?
Yes but- 100% agreed
I just don't get it. Video games don't suck his dick.
Um he just came into the kitchen naked to get her purse or something?
you pulled down your pants to convince a girl you were god
Wanna skype?
Can your lips gently and pleasantly suck on my balls via skype? If not, then no.
Getting stoned at work has never been a good idea, but im always more than willing to give it another chance
I almost bumped into a man wrapped only in a blanket at 10 am
I should start wearing my Batman shirt more often when I drink. Good things happen. All sorts of shit.
Lol no. She's home safe. You forget she is too pretty to get arrested.
I think the exact words were 'I'd lett him to the weirdest shit to me'
You've lost booty call privileges between the hours of 10pm and 8am.
This kid wants me to stop partying. Like I have only known you for 5 days. Chill.
She called to tell me she just hooked up with my crush...and that he talked about me...not sure if I should be pissed or excited?
I'm seriously considering starting a savings account so I'll have bail money this summer.
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