Random question, how's your gag reflex these days
just opened a can of spagetti o's with a butter knife. the things u will do for food when ur stoned.
How is it possible that I am in a completely different city, and there are 2 dudes here that I've banged? How????
He said he had a problem he needed to take care of before we got omelets and then showed me his erection.
Post-shopping-cart-scooter-jousting victory fuck?
ya i guess you have to take things with a grain of salt in a place where nipple clamps are the norm..
by the way- Brandy out of a doggy bowl was AMAZING
Just saw a guy I fucked in a clown suit in the bar. It's not Halloween. I have got to start making better life decisions.
I just had my first lesbian experience. Out of spite.
someone snapchatted me a porn of two guys dressed up as pterodactyls double teaming a girl
I swear to god if you eat that last piece of pie while I'm gone I will never speak to you again. I'm so serious.
All he gave me was a sore vagina and film suggestions
I stepped in puke last night then washed it off my shoe with beer. Is there a grace period to respect before wearing them to class?
I have need of you to return home with haste, as I require the magical capsules you possess to relieve the posterior pain I am living. I battle this demon with stubborn grit, however I feel that defeat is on the horizon.
just said thank you to the lady who gave me a body search at the airport
Randomize
