There's nothing I can say to make me pepper spraying you any better
Take this only to mean that we love you, but we're having a serious, half-hour, hypothetical discussion about how far we think we could throw you.
Oh, and I'm only keeping her around till spring. Doing the hunt for cunt is too tough in 12" of snow.
Girl at work pointed out that the blood vessels around my eyes were all popped and I smell like puke
By the taste of his semen he isnt vegetarian and therefore lied to me to take me home on a brighter note i stole his fondue set
Can't wait to hear which one of you won the 'fuck a bigger geek' contest last night. Queen Amidala vs Lara Croft. See you at breakfast.
Just from watching vine I come to conclusion that all pornstars are dog hoarders.
I no longer believe that the road to self esteem is through his penis.
I just swallowed some ecstasy stuck in my nose from last night. Work should be interesting.
How bad would it be if I asked him for my "ho ho ho" thong back? They're my fav christmas pair!
i wear a size 32DD bra. its basically impossible for me to get a speeding ticket
Wikipedia just saved you three hours and $30 on a bar tab. You should donate.
$5. Donated.
Like its not even midnight and I've already had enough of her for all of 2015
There's a bull to ride and dancing on the bar is encouraged. This is my heaven. And this is why god made leopard tube tops.
Seeing my ex post concert Snapchat videos as an Instagram really reinforces that I made the right choice...
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