Doo rag and shades in the bar. You are missing your future husband.
I've already planned a drinking game for mtvs jersey shore....jagerbomb everytime they do
he came over wasted, used the bathroom, drank some water, and fell asleep holding my hand. what kind of a fuck buddy does that??
i had to pay fifty dollars for throwing up in the limo, 60 fucking dollars to throw up all over myself
i'm sitting pantsless eating potato chips and watching porn before he picks me up for our date. I hope he's ready for this...
Without me, you would never be able to say you partied with a midget!
Just painted my nails at the bar... I may be getting too comfortable here.
So you plan on doing double washing machine sex? Like. A double date. But with sex. On a washing machine..?
My feelings are currently in a sea of vodka and "I don't give a shit"
Aren't they always?
We sent off fireworks off in the taco bell drive through. They're taking it way too seriously.
The bed I'm sleeping in has a headboard only handcuffs could love. I'm gonna pick up a local dude and wreck that.
I'm ashamed and embarrassed. Unless we get drunk and have random sex with people we will never see again we might lose ourselves.
He asked if I could ever take him seriously, I told him I just like his doggy style.....needless to say I snuck out after an awkward cuddle session... I wont be calling him at 2 am anymore.
I was looking at our sex bingo and pretty much every single row or column has at least one kind of person that is harder to find than all the rest
We've made things harder for ourselves
The struggle will be part of the fun
I mean, he’s listed as “Andrew DC Threesome” in my phone. THATS HOW I REMEMBER HIM! How is that not the start of a fairytale?
Randomize
