The way you explained my vagina was exactly the way I would of described my breakfast burrito.
Then I opened the closet and then i found the babies
you passed out when you kept trying to hold your breath during the underwater scenes of 2012
Someone just pulled taco bell tacos out of their purse in class....2 problems with here. 1) this class is nutrition 2) taco bell is not open this early.
He managed to light the Jello on fire...
My boyfriend just sent me flowers. I am now crying at the fact i fucked my fat neighbor. God please help me.
It's official. The summoning powers of my vagina are unmatched by anything in this world.
Dude she only counts as your gf if you're home. We both signed the fair game contract when we became roommate. So are you really going to be mad or come eat a waffle with us?
scream really loud. we think you crawled under the deck
Just paid off my possession ticket on 4/20. Helloooo awesome.
I'm starting to think that birthday sex is just an urban legend. Like the boogey man, and woman orgasms.
Just set out 2 water bottles as an offering to my hungover self.
I can not be a lesbian living on Beaverland.
You continued to run around saying "free the nipple" while "taste testing" every liquor on the premises.
I wore his All-American medal during sex. I came in first that night.
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