is that paris hilton dressed up as the guy from star trek who hosts reading rainbow
Level of drunkenness: just now when I sat down on the toilet, I had to double check to make sure I wasn't sitting on somebody's lap.
do you think theyll let us bring mariachis to the strip club?
I can promise you that this new years eve will rival the one from senior year when we got that exchange student deported.
While looking for an apartment, I've realized that the way I rate balconies is on the "how easy would it be to smoke weed here" scale.
What other scale is there?
Why i have shady connections. Owner just txt me asking to come by and judge the new stripper.
Hey, I told her the bathroom was a "No fly zone" after I used it. She willingly allowed her nose to go through that pain. It's her fault, she only supplied me with vodka when she knows I only drink rum.
why do all the dudes in this porno look like billy ray cyrus
do you ever wish you could like, jerk your heart off and be, like, emotionally satisfied? it'd feel like cuddling.
I just need some dick and some jimmy johns
I'm now having weird sexual fantasies about that riverdancing figure skater. So thanks for that.
I'm in a corner eating carrots and drinking champagne. I've hit a new kind of low.
How is that low? I love carrots.
Thank you for helping a fellow gay friend today. You are sublime and deserve free tickets to the Ellen show
I miss you.
Yeah, I don't want to have sex.
Nice. I got home at like 3am.stopped at Walmart for a vacuum and weirdly a trash can. Not sure why high me last night needed a new trashcan.
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