if you're gona send my txt to that site at least change my area code plz
I think most guys look at porn as a fallback career. I mean I know I do.
everyone made a circle around them and startd chanting fight fight. they wernt fighting, they were dry humping
Woke up to a huge puddle of water in the living room floor, apparently I made an indoor snowman.
make sure nobody uses the downstairs toilet. i like to have an unused toilet for the weekends. dont shit where you puke i always say.
proof that my night is going well: I can still open doors
You went down on Rachel in front me last night. Worst. Brother. Ever.
Well, I found the missing blow... in my fucking suitcase... THIS MORNING. Yeah, I flew from FL to NY with blow in my suitcase yesterday.
I told you to check, dude
Yeah, AFTER I checked my bag and I was already sitting on a plane. Oh well. I figured worst case I'd do like 15 hours in county and I was totally prepared for that anyways. I always prepare for that when we hang out.
No lie. I was hooking up with a former football player at UT and mid-hookup I yelled "I'M FRATERNIZING WITH THE ENEMY"
I'm too socially awkward and sexually frustrated to get through this evening sober.
I remember puking but I don't remember where. PSA: don't go barefoot around the house
REMEBER. We are young, horny, and poor. If someone wants to give us alcohol... TAKE. IT.
Why are you naked at 4pm?
Its my birthday, I dont have to wear clothes
some guy had a sword and everyones crying..it turned bad..fast.
In celebration of finishing my homework, lets drink tea w/ vodka
Randomize
