No, you can still breathe under the balls.
I'm driving in the middle of nowhere, and I just saw a stuffed Barney hanging from a noose on a tree. Maybe I should turn around.
this is the fifth day in a row i've woken up after 3 pm, hungover. I might die when snowmageddon is finally over and we have to go back to class. my liver wont know how to take it.
On ecstasy, in Ikea. this is incredible.
You seriously looked at the house acorss the street and implied that you thought they had nice Easters.
I have located the smell of the stripper and narrowed it down to 3 girls in class
We had to leave after he was in the middle of the street yelling "Balls of Steeeeeeeeel!!"
I got a letter from the home owners association saying its against policy to have sex on the trampoline.
As we were about to go at it, his roommates barged in singing jumper by third eye blind. Weirdest almost one night stand ever.
I woke up in a bunk bed beside two Brazilians dude you have no idea how happy I was
drunk snapchatting is the worst, because i woke up with great pictures of my tits saved to my memories and no idea who i sent them to
If I don't get struck by a lightning bolt from God by midnight it will be a Christmas miracle.
She can be as judgemental as she wants. But she thinks the female orgasm is a myth so who is really winning here...
It's time you knew: I have been dating your probation officer for 7 months. Pretty certain he's THE ONE. So, thanks for being a criminal.
You fell asleep while I was sucking your dick
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