You dropped me off at the wrong girl's house.
There's no such thing as a "wrong girl" make it happen.
alright see you in the morning.
Found a waterbottle filled with a bloody mary in my purse this morning. Blacked-out me is always trying to help hungover me, it's so cute.
I'm sorry, but you without makeup is like christmas without presents.
I dated that bitch for 9 months and didnt get as much as a hand job. I met her sister last night for the first time and smashed that...twice
I respect that
everybody makes mistakes
i didn't know they allowed you to text in ambulances
some drunk guy just paid $3 for each cig that i picked up off the ground. the cigs that he threw on the ground. I might just follow him the rest of the night
I honestly can't remember your justification for putting peanut butter on your cell phone.
I will now send you explicit pics of mine and her genetalia bound together forever in the devils dance that is sexting.
It takes a special friend to go vibrator shopping with
Yes. It does.
And suddenly....Tubas. Tubas everywhere.
she came into my car to rip lines with our blow dealer as I was writing my essay on anti drug policy, i call it on site research
You're the best friend ever. I wouldn't want to do the walk of shame with anyone else.
I feel like I could get pregnant watching Zac Efron do yard work in this movie
I am witnessing a blind guy whip ass at beer pong
she broke the sink..i repeat the sink is off the wall. send help
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