if he's not good at sex i should be allowed to have sex with someone who is. that's a totally legit statement i think
just got pizza delivered to the hot tub. its easier than i thought to be this lazy
this morning i woke up with my panties on and i knew where i was. success.
He left the bathroom door open so i would hear him masturbate in the shower to make me feel guilty for not putting out but it just turned me on cause i like guys masturbating. weird?
I'm so fucking pissed that I wasted my shooting star wish on him and his little penis.
as i creep her facebook pics from back in the day till now, i noticed that her lazy eye has gotten better
I need to talk about my life with someone. Preferably with someone who hasn't tried to jizz on me
using blue streamers we found on the bathroom floor was probably not the best substitute for toilet paper.
My way of showing team usa support, bronze: handy silver: bj gold: home run. God, I'm patriotic
don't act like you've never hung your towel on your dick after getting out of the shower
We'll just charge in there, all pant less and fabulous demanding he give back her ferret.
Okay, I just got to our real hotel and the YMCA may have been a better choice. A man w/ no shirt on
We smoked a huge blunt and then laid in bed naked eating strawberry shortcake good humor bars. We have the perfect relationship.
So apparently my mom hired someone who goes by "DJ Dog Dick" for the family christmas party?
He puked in the middle of it and I still wasn't disappointed.
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