I'm really into asian looking animals
before i could say "i'm not that kind of girl", i was.
haha you were like: "I don't want to uh pressure you.." as you took your own shirt off
He said he was from Mississippi and my vagina clamped shut like a frightened oyster
and then he said that some chick told him he danced like an epileptic on crystal meth. he then proceeded to demonstrate this statement, which i can testify is 100% accurate.
distance makes the heart seek blowjobs from girls that are closer i heard.
you kept telling her you'd make a great step-dad while cuddling her and rubbing her back...
What did he say? I couldn't hear him over the sound of how awesome his beard is.
I just entered us to win a trip to Vegas for spring break. GET YOUR VAGINA READY FOR THE ULTIMATE DICK HUNT!
Well, you know sobriety isn't something I like to do on the reg.
I would just like to go ahead and accept my slut of the year award.
It's like 10 times better than an Oscar
You peed on a pole and declared to a cop that it was your pole and yelled at him to not even look at it, and then yelled at all of us for looking at it.
Hooked up with a guy that looked like Dean Thomas. Mediocre at best, but I stopped myself from calling him Dean in bed. So I got that going for me.
Is there some sort of line being crossed when your shower activities start to involve jimmy johns?
Happy 20th birthday! I hope you like anxiety and having your debit card declined at McDonald's!
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