her nipple to breast ratio was just odd
Tell her to not eat the pizza she threw up on.
did i by any chance text you anything about feathers last night?
you mean faeutihaers?
whispering "taste the rainbow" well having sex isn't my biggest turn on.
next time a party gets busted lets get a group photo first.
Someone spilled vodka all over the elevator floor. Bring straws.
You had the nerve to crowd surf to your own bedroom.. I guess watching Aladdin high was probably the best idea ever
Im invoking the "no judgements" clause of our friendship.
My god, what have you done?
I just woke and boke and made apple pancakes. I'm kicking Monday in the dick.
I literally woke up walked into the bathroom, threw up and died this morning. Then went to my 8am.
I feel like I put a fire out with my hand but idk if that was a dream or not
Googling enemas while I get a pedicure ... My life in one senence
This will never work. His dick is smaller than mine.
Wow. And yours is kind of small.
RIGHT?
just saw those girls we met the other night. i happen to be wearing a bunny suit and driving your smart car. i think its safe to say thats a no go situation.
He sent me the milestone first dick pic this morning, it looked like a baby's fist holding a tree trunk. I'm frightened and aroused in equal measure.
Randomize
