i think i have reached a jessica simpson level of regret
She's dressed as Musafa. How could this not be a good idea?
your dad made us margaritas and breakfast on the morning. I think it's safe to say he relives his glory days through us
Why are all the dvds taped to the fish tank. Really.
She kept talking about how amazing the banana she had yesterday was. Don't know if it was innuendo, stoned, or just a really amazing banana.
I know you all think its cute to drop me off in a different state when I black out, but I can't wake up in family campgrounds asking where I am. These parents are scared.
I should probably drink beer instead of rum today so I don't end up naked in my living room while I still have guest.
Yeah probably not. I have a hair appt, a gun class, and hopefully a boy to fuck. I'm booked.
I'm at that point in my life where stripping isn't the worst thing I would do for money
I wanna be like, dude, I peed your bed. Like you laid in my pee. And we're not dating. You can find another fuck buddy who I'm sure won't piss on you.
He brought me flowers and then spanked me with a Doctor Who paddle. Pretty good night, as these things go.
Awwwwwww!
he walked off and puked in the sand. then he made a sand castle over it so that "it wouldn't upset the kids"
I did crash a prom last night though.. It was fun
A piece of your chipped nail polish just fell out of my crotch.
No, I told him I was busy again this weekend. Eventually he’ll learn. Plus, absence makes the cock grow harder
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