I woke up naked in my living room and my mom was next to me like we need to talk
He said he only talked to me because I talk dirty in bed.
was it more than 30 minutes?
ya
then you're in a relationship
btw, her name was actually Alixx. in retrospect, it was pretty much a gimme
She just left after she spent the past 2.5 hours fuckin the shit out of me. I'll put that in the logbook as a cross country
Someone is gonna learn how to start an IV in the morning
Playing basket ball at the park with random people that showed up at 1am. the division of teams is based on what drugs people are on
CONGRATULATIONS! You have won: pictures of my nipples!
So a guy died and our dates revived him with CPR. Good night?
He's so twisted that he's acting out Dragon Ball-Z by himself. The Tanquray and THC combo doesn't play around.
You shouldn't play strip poker when you're having a wet fart kind of day.
Do you know this guy sitting in front of us? Asking for my vagina.
Come get your boyfriend. He is hammered talking to me about hot dogs and casinos.
SUFFER THE WRATH OF THE PISS BAG
can I CTRL ALT DELETE this universe
Randomize
