I have show me your genitals stuck in my head. Except in spanish. Muestrame tus genitals. Tus genitals.
What's the point of having 3 fuck buddies when their periods all seem to sync up
Even my Russian and Serbian roommates think I drink to much.
his profile picture is him throwing up "#1" hands after his lax championship next to his coach that i fucked....embarrasing for him, yet ironically beautiful for me.
Taking my tights off outside the club to give them to the homeless man was my contribution to humanity. The fact that it was snowing just made me feel like superman.
Just coat-checked 2 backpacks full of 40's...it was the bouncer's idea.
You had us pull over so you could pee, you proceeded to pee in some random persons front yard while yelling "im not ashamed"
If me getting shot doesn't get me pussy I am officially gay
Diet Starts Tomorrow! Guy from McDonalds asked if I got a new car...
Took off my bra at the laundry mat to throw it in I am officially white trash
I'm going to get high and eat ice cream until the pain goes away. You're welcome to join.
I'm still drunk dear. I just woke up 3 feet from the front door with 20 dollars worth of taco bell in my hands.
I still judge her for aggressively trying to get coke from my date but pretty cool that she's a black belt
I feel so accomplished. I've cleaned my room, done laundry, called those places, gotten jobs, and masturbated.
I'm so proud of you.
He ate me out for my sailor moon manga and I gave him a blowjob for his Devilman manga. Pretty sweet deal imo
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