Pretty people don't get stds, I knew it
My penis is the apex of life and all other references. Lookin for a cheap vagina at this point. And cheap Korean BBQ
Gotta love hanging with Nat. By the time guys realize she isnt going home with them, they've spent enough money and time to think I'm a good idea.
She has puke in her hair, is missing a shoe and is now crying. People trust her to be their child's teacher
I just saw a girl on crutches doing a walk of shame. She is either super dedicated, or her night didn't go as planned.
Sexual tension squid is drowning in the sexual tension
this is what happens when you pick a roommate a year in advance.. she ends up hating you for hooking up with for of her extended family members
I think I hit my head on every surface in that apartment last night
just found out that she named her cat after me.
My suggestion is that you just get high and set shit on fire
i just googled coccaine effects on sexual performance..maybe im dating the wrong guy
You insisted that your middle name was "velociraptor" for 20 minutes and every time someone said something you tried to relate it to velociraptors. That kind of drunk.
hey, so i dont know your name. but im guessing we had sex last night. seeing that you're in my phone as "had sex time thursty thursday guy"
Your vagina is awesome, like it needs to teach a class for other vaginas
Is it wrong for me to wish my cat had arms to get me a beer?
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