Regardless thnx for trying to help out, I realize we are dealing w/ very stupid girls here
Goddamnit I hate your level headedness
3 different guys in my psych class know me as 3 different names and said hi to me with all 3 different names-Andrea, Grace, and Bella
I've never been more proud of you
She bet her virginity on the Celtics. Looks like Kobe wont be the only one breaking in a new ring.
On your way out, lock the front door. And by lock the front door, I mean find the door handle, reattach it, and then lock it.
Sonogram pictures belong on a fucking fridge...NOT FACEBOOK!!
How do the people at CVS not know your living in their bathroom?
Passed out on her toilet. Dog licked my face to wake me. Awkward talk with her boyfriend, who hadn't been home last night. Not sure exactly what town I'm in, but I'm south. Will call for ride when I figure it out.
You walked in on me taking a shit and told me to hit the bong
Your penis has nothing to do with my throat infection, sorry...
She didn't get a tit job, she's just wearing the right size bra for once
I’m drunk and naked and looking for my charger - title of my autobiography.
you asked me how to turn on the ladder
I should probably apologize for licking you last night since you drove me home, but I stand by my decision
He just canceled. I got an amazing new dress and now he’s decided he’s spending the weekend with his family
In other news, there’s some rando in an expensive hotel bar who is going to get very lucky tonight because I love the way this dress makes my tits look. Want to help me find him?
Randomize
