you wouldn't even come home last night... Dead to me
Dude, the girl i fucked last night left wearing my high school musical shirt you bought me. she also left her panties here though.
The one with Zac Efrons face on it? You definitely got the short in of the stick. i'd rather have the shirt
fuck. yeah me too. i don't even think these panties would fit me
i friday night watching house. god, i need a life, friends, and a legitimate fake id.
Different chick, same blowjob, same parking lot.
fuck yea just found my unicorn costume from when i was 8... still fits
is not sure whether or not everyone at the club last night calling me a-easy is a good thing?
Yeah. We was talkin. Its ok. My bed is too filled with pam for sex. Its like a slip and slide of butter product.
What can I say? When alcohol is my motivation, I can move mountains.
He visits one Denver strip club and now hes moving there
I'm so busy i barely have time to have sex with myself. I have to talk myself into it like an old married couple.
I can never have sex in Utah again. The altitude had me breathing like a fat kid going up stairs.
Opened my notebook to coke all over the pages. So, if that's any indication on how this weekend went.
How do you get the "hangs out with drunk assholes" insurance
He stood next to me peeing as I was puking behind a car in the parking lot, telling me how much he loved me. On the other hand, he loves me!
I hear my roommate snoring and I feel bad for his girlfriend but then I hear them having sex and I guess it all works out in the end.
Randomize
