How can i ever say i miss u when u wont go away
You deserve yourself a blunt and a build a bear.
iPhone photo doodle is awesome. I gave my vagina some lazers and sent it to him. He has a whole series waiting on his phone for when he gets off the plane.
She kept saying "I'm going to hell" the entire time we were fucking. I really wasn't sure what to do... so I agreed with her.
That was definitely the right answer.
He walked me home last night across campus while i fed him pasta out of a solo cup at 3 am.
I need to sleep with 3 more guys by midnight to meet my 2010 resolution..
Before attempting to fly away into the night you asked me to take care of your sister. I agreed.
At first i thought she was a sexily dressed toddler. but not in a pedophile way, in a really on drugs way
i was debating whether to load antoher bowl when i realized i was holding a sandwich in one hand and a cookie in the other. and laughing.
I'm starting to think you fell asleep on your kitchen floor pantless with salsa spilt around you
Mistakes were made. Hot mistakes that I want to make again. But tapping your employee is def a mistake. Esp in front of two other employees.
And I'm sorry for punching you in the face when I drunkenly threw my sandwich
The taste of regret at 8am, yup that taste is Jack Daniel's
Is it possible for mice to climb? If so I think mice are climbing into my bed in the night and playing with my hair..
Need to use your shower bro.
FWB wearing glitter again?
It’s like she’s marking her territory
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